Mr P requested this access some time ago, after IP Draughts had nominated him as the firm’s compliance officer for training and development (CLOT). Readers will recall that some irregularities had been discovered in Mr P’s training record, including whether he had ever qualified as a solicitor. Rightly or wrongly (and probably wrongly) IP Draughts thought the solution to this problem was to make Mr P responsible for completing the relevant SRA form on behalf of the firm. To do this, Mr P needed access to the SRA website, as they require all filings to be done electronically.
Unfortunately, this has had some unforeseen consequences. Mr P has not confined himself to his duties as CLOT. He has used his access to the SRA website to make “corrections” to other parts of the Anderson Law filings. For a short time, our diversity report indicated that the firm was populated entirely by left-handed sociologists from Kazakhstan, who had been privately educated in Switzerland, and whose parents had been to university.
Fortunately, Deirdre Sprocket (our archivist and former head librarian, who also has access to the site) noticed the change before the SRA did, and reinstated the original data, which is nothing like Mr P’s version. For instance, several members of the firm are right-handed.
Part of the problem is that Mr P has too much time on his hands. His last piece of fee-paying client work was done nearly a decade ago. Regrettably he is not willing to retire. Every time this step is suggested to him, he points out that the firm’s partnership agreement, which he drafted in 1967, sets a retirement age for partners of 99 years 11 months and 30 days.
Recently, the other partners in Anderson Law have seen a glimmer of light on the horizon. They have quietly made sure that Mr P is aware of a fantastic job opportunity for someone of Mr P’s background and experience. Vacancies have recently been announced for judges of the Unified Patent Court. Deirdre Sprocket has been tasked with making sure that Mr P sends in his “expression of interest” by the deadline in November. Meanwhile, references are being sought from several retired Court of Appeal judges, and favours are being called in at the Ministry of Justice. With a bit of luck, the problem of Mr Pettifog will be solved in the not-too-distant future.